Welcome to Cuzcotopia 2006! Here's how it works.

This here blog chronicles our fabulous trip to Peru, from December 28 through January 8th or so. We saw a lot of Incan ruins, got ruined by some local Peruvian food, and got engaged on the sacred mountain of Machu Picchu. It's going to be hard to top this one, but it's a big world out there. I'm sure we'll manage.

The posts here are a mixture of live reports made from the field and photographic evidence that wasn't uploaded until we got back home. I reckon the best way to get the full Cuzcotopia experience is to start at the bottom and read each post on the way up. Even if you did this a week ago, I just finished slotting everything into its correct place, so you may have missed a few photos.

One note on "Cuzco" versus "Cusco": They're both correct spellings. "Q'osq'o" is the original spelling in Quechua, the indigenous tongue, and "Cuzco" is the Spanish translation. I think "Cusco" is an attempt to Quechua-ify the Spanish. I stick with "Cusco" throughout for continuity. I may be the only person out there who finds this paragraph interesting, but I don't care because it's my blog. Thank you for your interest.

Please enjoy Cuzcotopia 2006.

Heeeeeeeeeeeellllllpppppp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

We are stuck in Lima. Lima is not a fun city to be stuck in. Lima is dirty. Lima is noisy. Lima is not Denver, where my bed and car and dog live.

Even though we were booked and confirmed on our flight home from Lima, we got bumped because we checked in just too late (we were coming in from Cusco and had to pick up our bags, etc.)

Actually, I´d like to call out Nathan and Efrain on this one. This is all your fault. Your souvenir caused us to have to check the bag in the first place. So Efrain, when you open the bills with your new llama letter opener, remember the blood and tears it cost for us to mule it across all of South America.

Anyway, the airline gave us a hotel for the night and some vouchers that they lied to us about because we thought they were cash but they´re not, they´re just vouchers towards another purchase on their shitty airline and why would they think that we would want something like that that´s just like them they´re owned by United doesn´t that figure can´t do a damn thing right.

Yay, South American travel!!!! Yayy! ¡Es estupendo!

And the rest

We made our way back to Cusco from Ollantaytambo via private taxi, just because we were too tired to recreate the chicken bus experience. Don't get me wrong -- a private taxi in Peru is just as adventurous as a chicken bus, and just as likely to cause accidental death and/or dismemberment.



The best thing about the flight back to Lima? The "live vest" that lived beneath our seats. I want a pet vest to take home!

Mas fiesta!

The beauty is, these people weren't doing this for the benefit of tourists, considering we were some of the only gringos in town. Rather, they were doing it because this is how they've done it for hundreds of years.

The Nino in question.

No, those aren't white guys in the parade, those are masks. Seriously. Left-click the picture for a larger version if you don't believe me.

Fiesta!

When we checked into our hotel, we ran into the American owner, who was pleased to tell us that our visit coincided with one of the village's annual fiestas. She said that processions and other ceremonies would be taking place throughout that day and the next. While we were up on the hillside checking out the fortress of Ollantaytambo, we caught our first glimpse of finely costumed locals making their way to one of the churches, playing music and dancing as they went. There was even a few cannon shots that reverberated endlessly among the massive mountains that surround the village.

Here's the procession we saw from the hillside. Though this is zoomed in a lot, we could hear them just fine! The music was great.

Later that day, we fell into the back of this procession, which consisted of villagers who were taking armloads of beautiful flowers to the church where the Nino was. This little interval occurred when (seriously) no one had the keys to the church. It was funny.

Chris was amused by these musicians who had to wait along with everyone else. About a minute after this photo was taken, Chris' prediction came true, which was: "Watch, if nothing happens soon, they're going to start noodling on their horns." Musicians are the same in every country, it turns out.

Ollantaytambo

"Oy-yan-tay-tahm-bo." It's a mouthful, but we got used to it pretty quickly. After arriving in one piece and checking into our beautiful little B&B, we set out to see the town's Incan fortress, which looms high on the nearby hills. It's not as visually stunning as Machu Picchu or Sacsayhuaman, but we were impressed just the same. We were both glad it was the last ruin we were scheduled to see, because we were reaching our limit.

This seat was carved out of the existing rock and from it, we got a beautiful view of the town below.

The town of Ollantaytambo has been continuously inhabited since the Incans built it more than 800 years ago. The foundations of all the buildings are Incan-made, and the whole town is carefully planned in a grid of small blocks with elaborate means of draining water down to the Urubamba river.

I'm not sure if this stucco/plaster is original or not, but either way it shows how some buildings were put together with rougher stones and then covered with smooth plaster.

Doing the funky chicken (bus)

Liz here. Chris signed us in on his account, and the internet tubes are waaay too slow here to bother re-signing in.

After we successfully made it back from war-torn Aguas Calientes (everything looked pretty peaceful when we left, but you never know when the mayor´s appearance may have incited major violence), we spent the next day in Cusco where we took in a few more of the sights and finally had our dinner of cuy, which is roasted guinea pig. It was fantabulous. Cuy meat is tender, juicy, and buttery. Mmmm... cuy.

Today, we decided to go a couple towns over to the city of Ollantaytambo, which was originally planned and built by the Incas and has been continuously inhabited since the 13th century. The foundations are all Incan stonework, and drainage canals and waterworks still keep the river at bay. There is also a pretty cool Incan fortress ruin above the city.

Getting here was the real adventure, though. We tried for a while to get a big, air conditioned tour bus here, but found that it´s just not possible. Plenty of tour companies were willing to sell us big involved tours of the whole Sacred Valley, but not just a bus to Ollantaytambo. Everyone told us the same thing. "Go to Puente Grau, get a local bus." Fine. We humped it to this bridge in Cusco where all the local buses are and paid 7 soles (US $2) for both of us to take a 2 hour ride to Urubamba, where we´d have to change buses. We felt pretty smug at our local acumen, as we were the only gringos on the bus. When the bus left, there were a couple people standing in the aisles. Here's a picture of the type of bus we were on...


We figured that they´d be getting off a few stops down the line. Wrong. Not only did they stay on, our little bus kept taking on more and more passengers. When we got to the next big town, the most amazing thing happened. Without any warning or conversation, everyone standing in the aisles crouched down below window level. There must be some sort of safety checkpoint in the area. The beauty is, whoever works the security checkpoint must take these buses from time to time, so they know what´s going on. The situation was a beautiful example of how South America works. People crouch down to avoid being seen, the security guy can honestly tell his supervisor that he didn´t see any extra people on the bus, and life goes on.


When we finally reached Urubamba, we were quickly ushered towards a vehicle no larger than a VW microbus to continue our journey to Ollantaytambo. Finally, we were to ride on what is affectionately known throughout the Americas as "the chicken bus." Today, there were no chickens, but there were 21 souls onboard. Twenty-one. In a microbus. Fortunately, it was only a 20 minute ride.


Ollantaytambo is a lovely little village, and we are lucky enough to have arrived during the Fiesta del Niño de Something or Other. We will try to catch some of the festivities and document them for your pleasure.

Tomorrow we´ve got some shopping to do, then it´s back to Cusco for our last night in country. It´s been a great trip, but I´m hankering for some proper nachos.

I would eat that!

The title of this post is an homage to my Grandpa Bob, who has stated that he would eat just about anything. This is why he is so cool. We were telling him at Christmas about the native delicacies in Peru, and mentioned guinea pig. His face lit up and he said, "I would eat that!"

So here, for Grandpa Bob and everyone else, are the pictures of Chris and I with our plates of cuy. It was very rich tasting, kind of buttery, and a little greasy but not in a bad way. Guinea pig is good eating, people.

Yes, we sent them

And I'm sorry if yours doesn't arrive. Mail is notoriously bad in Peru, so when the time came to send postcards, we went all the way down to the central post office in Cusco to give them the best chance of survival. Here's proof that we actually wrote, paid for, and sent each and every one of our friends and family members a postcard.



They weren't cheap either. Like US $2 per postcard, which in other situations in Peru is enough to pay for 2 tickets on a long-ass bus ride.

Demonstration in the streets of Cusco

It just ain't a vacation in South America without at least one demonstration. We're not sure what this one was about, but there were lots of bullhorns, flag waving, and the ever-present representation of Evil Uncle Sam (look for the oversized stars and stripes-decorated top hat in the crowd.)

The rainbow flag has been used in Peru and surrounding countries since the time of the Incans, representing the unity of the different territories controlled by the Incan emperor. Today, it's used to symbolize native Quechuan pride.

Requisite Incan statue in the plaza

Every town seems to have one. This was the Incan plaza statue in Aguas Calientes.

Riot in Aguas Calientes!!!!

Okay, not really. We´re in a second-story internet cafe on the main plaza of Aguas Calientes, and we looked down to see a collection of police gathering near our corner. They were wearing the same security guard-looking ballcaps and vests as always, but they all had full-length riot shields that say POLICIA on them. One of them even had a tear gas launcher. A tear gas launcher, people. We couldn´t figure it out until a man in a tie emerged. Ah. The new mayor. Now there is a large group of people crowded around him, possibly to get autographs or blessings for their chickens.

The riot gear-clad police look a bit sheepish, but it´s probably the only excuse they´ve ever had to bust out the gear that the national government issues to them, and they´re jealous of their peers in Cusco and Lima who get to use it far more often. So far the crowd appears to be waiting patiently under an awning out of the rain to get a glimpse of the new dignitary. There will be pictures forthcoming, as with everything else. News updates as we get them. From mob-ruled Aguas Calientes, this is Liz. Back to you in the studio.

Machu PICCHU!!

So we have finally made it to the main event! After a number of twists and turns getting to the tiny pueblo of Aguas Calientes, we saw our first glimpse of the lost royal Incan retreat of Machu Picchu. I must say, it was as amazing as you can imagine. Buildings constructed on a remote jungle mountaintop that gets, on average 77 inches of rain a year, still standing. Honestly, with some thatch roofs, the place could be inhabitable.

The day up to MP was a long one, with us rising before dawn to catch the 4 hr train ride from Cusco to Aguas Calientes. The trip was very beautiful, but for the loud Americans sitting behind us. While we thought about catching up on sleep, it really wasn´t possible to have this beautiful countryside pass us by in our sleep.

Upon arrival in the pueblo, we attempted to obtain a place to stay, as we hadn´t set up a room beforehand. With something like 120 hostels and hotels in the area, we figured we could wing it. After trying a few LP recommendations, as well as not being able to even find several of their recommendations, we hung our heads and walked into ¨Gringo Bill´s¨, a nice hostel/hotel in the plaza of this small berg of a town. The place was ok, and we took it, anxious to get to MP, as the last bus down the mountain was 5:30, and the weather can be sketchy.

Sooo, we started on the hunt for MP tickets. We had heard that you have to buy the tickets in town, as they don´t sell them on the site. After talking to the Peru information desk, we learned that the ticket window was approx. 15 ft away from where we were standing, asking for directions. At the sad, gov´t run ticket window, you can only pay in local currency, no credit cards, no US cash, even though most shopkeeps seem to only have US dollars! Anyway, I am being told I am being long winded...the ticket lady took our wheelbarrow of Soles, and proceeded to give me change in 10 cent increments!

Weighed down by a pocketful of change, we arrived in MP with a splendid view - the ¨money shot¨which will inevitably become my screensaver. The day was lots of doors, windows and steps, all of which are well described in our self guided tour book, which we are extremely grateful that we brought, as they don´t provide anything to tourists entering the site, not even the crappy map that you would expect!

The evening was capped by a lovely dinner at a local restaurant, probably the best in the whole town. I had me some grilled alpaca, which was tough, but I got a lot of meat. Liz´s appetite returned pretty much 100%, and we marveled at playing Name That Tune to the Peruvian pan pipe cover album, featuring such greats as Tears in Heaven, Unbreak My Heart and the Dirty Dancing song.

As we returned to our hotel, we noticed what previously we thought was a church festival, to be actually a full on community fiesta event. At volume reaching 11.5, the band rocked on in the square below our hotel window. Unsure as to what this was all about, we asked our hotel front desk clerk, who informed us that the town had a new mayor. We named him ¨Mayor McQueso¨and cursed his name through the night, as the party went well past midnight. Mind you that we were scheduled to get up at 4:00 am to catch the first bus up to MP!

Needless to say, we slept with one ear plug in, and the other plastered to the pillow, with the hopes that we would hear the alarm in the morning, and see MP in its morning glory.

MP -- Day Two

Don't worry, this day will be a lot shorter than yesterday's. We didn't get nearly as many pictures, partly because of the dense cloud cover and mostly because we were all dopey from having just gotten engaged.

We got up at 4 am after about 2 hours of sleep, thanks to Mayor McQueso, but we were excited to get back up to MP so the groggy factor was pretty minimal. Actually, Chris says he was just about crapping his pants, but that's mostly because he was about T-minus 30 minutes to proposing.

We caught the first bus up the mountain at 0530 ("What does the '0' stand for? Oh my God, it's early." Still funny after all these years) and were kind of surprised that visibility was crap. I mean, we shouldn't have been surprised -- we were at like 8,000 feet in a rainforest -- but you know how it is. None of the pictures you see of Machu Picchu are ever foggy. It's the same reasoning that catches people off guard when they visit Los Angeles for the first time and are surprised that they can't see the mountains that are always clearly visible on the postcard.

Once on-site, Chris wanted to climb up to the top of the terracing where we had started our wanderings the day before, but I wouldn't let go of the concept that the view wouldn't be any better up there than it was where we were standing. Fortunately, this small change in plans didn't freak him out too much -- he was able to pull out my ring just fine where we were standing. We took a picture of the happy event, and quickly realized that no one would be able to tell where in the world we were, so we returned a few hours later and recreated the scene.

The "real" picture:

The "hey look at us we're at Machu Picchu" picture:

I think they are both nice. For the next couple hours, we wandered around while Chris told me all the stories of how it takes a village to propose at Machu Picchu. Everyone was involved, apparently. Finally, we found ourselves in a random building in Conjunto 17 and started to get curious about what it was used for, so we pulled the book back out and resumed our educational vacation.

Check this out. Real live leaf-cutter ants! Proof we were, in fact, in the jungle. So cool. I just looked down and there they were! I am such a nerd!

Grand staircases were not too good for the Incans. Look how they incorporated the existing rock on both the left and right.

Don't look, Erica. Here's a view down the terraces to the Urubamba river far, far below.

You asked for it: some pictures of Machu Picchu

The Incans had abstract representative art. Take a look. When it was first discovered, people thought this thing was a sundial. But considering the uneven surfaces and angles, it doesn't work as one -- besides, if these people wanted to make straight lines, they certainly could. After "modern art" was invented, researchers started to think that this object was a sort of abstract totem that allowed Incans to offer sacrifices of chicha or whatever to the sacred mountains. Apparently there's one just like it on top of Huayna Picchu, but we couldn't climb the mountain because it was wet and dangerous.

The system of fountains at Machu Picchu is incredible. A series of stone canals channels water from a spring down to the first fountain, located within the royal residence. As you can see, the engineering is pretty good -- the water drains to a corner of the basin and moves down the hill a ways to the next fountain. There are 16 fountains in all, and 500 years later, the water still flows through them with no interruption.

Attention Trainer.

This is how I spent my vacation.

Mas Machu Picchu

Lots of times, the builders of Machu Picchu designed their buildings so that the angles of walls and the pitches of roofs were in perfect harmony with the backdrop of the mountains.

Dozens of workers toil endlessly to keep the jungle at bay. After passing several men scrubbing moss from the stones, I asked to take a picture of this man. He was amused and very flattered that I would want his picture.

No need for this picture, really. I just think I look good here. More pictures later!

More MP

This angle shows some of the terraces (on the left) that keep these buildings from sliding off the mountain in the 77 inches of rain that fall annually.

A 20-minute hike took us to this view of an Incan drawbridge. This path served as a back door to Machu Picchu. When the Incans didn't want anyone crossing the bridge, they simply removed the timbers that cross that big gap.

Here's Chris at the front door to Machu Picchu. The Incans were very careful to use their doors and windows to frame beautiful views of their sacred mountains. The big mountain that everyone associates with Machu Picchu is actually called Huayna Picchu. The mountain called Machu Picchu is actually behind you when you're looking at the traditional view.

Machu Picchu -- First Glance!

After an arduous journey to the town of Aguas Calientes and from there up to Machu Picchu, we got down to the business of learning about this amazingly engineered city. We had an excellent guide book written by people who have studied Machu Picchu for decades, so we were able to learn a lot about each area we walked through.

Pictures from afar can't capture how big the site really is -- once we were walking among the buildings, it became difficult to take good photos, just because we were so up close to everything.
Boy, I hated this hat. But I had to buy it to keep my scalp from burning off, and my only other real options in Cusco were ones that had retarded embroidery that said "MACHU PICCHU" on them.